I'm a Survivor - or so becoming one!!!

So far I am surviving this deployment. We are on #345 of the 400 day countdown. We are beginning our 3rd month in this process & I'm hoping Spring will hurry up and help make some time go by faster!!! I am doing pretty well considering. I am beginning to hear from hubby more often now & I think that has helped tremendously!!! He is the most perfect husband & I love the way he still shows & speaks of his love for me even though he's another world away!!! I miss him like crazy, but I know I WILL survive!!!!

Something to share

The Yellow Band of Gold

When lovers part for e'en a day -
For worthy cause, or no,
An empty heart must stay behind,
An empty heart must go.

The emptiness is still and dull -
Good times and smiles are few;
Unless a letter, two or three,
Will change the gray to blue.

The daily letter does the trick -
But lest a line grow old,
Rely upon a sterner stuff
A yellow band of gold.

The yellow band will light the way
In lovelife's darkest hour,
Renews a smile - relives a kiss,
Gives courage with new power.

This seal of old will say, "He's mine."
"He's mine and I am his."
Those words will echo in his heart,
No matter where he is.

Perhaps he's in a foreign land -
Or far out on the blue;
His deepest meditations are
His thoughts of love for you.

What is this yellow band of gold?
Is it a wedding ring?
Is it a picture, or a watch?
Or is it everything?

To me the seal is everything -
That I am fighting for;
Yes, it's a ring - and it's a watch,
But yet it's something more.

It seals a vow made long ago -
It's filed in realms above;
In truth it is a gift of God,
This band - the seal of love.

*This poem was written by Jerry B. Jenkin's dad in 1944 when he was 21 yrs. old & overseas. He liked to write poetry of love & devotion to his wife, he married after his return. He always referred to her as his "lifetime Valentine."

Absence makes the heart grow fonder...

"Couples who love each other tell each other a thousand things without talking. "~ Chinese Proverb

I can honestly say, my love for my husband is growing more & more each day. As hard as it is being apart during this dreaded deployment, it makes my love for him grow & grow with each new day. It makes me cherish the times I get to talk to him or get a message from him(as those are far & few between right now). And sometimes we don't even have to express it, we just know how much love we have in our hearts for each other. If there is one good thing that will come of this, it will be our increased love for one another! I love you Sweetheart!!!

400 Days

Today marks 400 days that I have been married to my best friend!!! As many of you know, my hubby is deployed right now & his orders are for exactly 400 days. So, if those 400 days can go by as fast as these 400 days did we are in good shape! It feels like just yesterday we were getting ready for our wedding day. I can remember that day so vividly well. It was nothing but perfect:) I could not imagine my life with anybody else other than my hubby. He is my perfect match.

I got to hear from him today by the way, he called me this morning to wish me a Happy Valentines Day. Sometimes it's just the little things that make me so happy. After all, he is overseas & they are having trouble with phone/internet connection. But, he found a way anyway to call me & tell me that he loves me:) I honestly have the BEST husband out there!!! He is my dream come true!!!

Hope everyone had a wonderful Valentines Day!

Where are you Valentine?

Tomorrow is Valentines Day & well my Valentine is just about a whole world away from me. Valentines Day has never been a huge, extravagant holiday since we have been together, but it makes a difference when he's nowhere around to even celebrate:( I miss my Valentine!!! If my Valentine were here today, we would probably be out in the snow making a snow man then coming in for some warm lunch & lay cuddled up on the couch with a good movie - then we would find a way to get out & celebrate Valentines Day. But, instead I'm here with Charlie (our dog) & my family to enjoy the snow while my Valentine is in a warm, sandy place. Maybe next years Valentines will be much better. I love you, Valentine.

On my mind....

Spring is on my mind alot these days!!! I can't wait for it to get here!!! I'm ready for some nice, sunny, warm weather!!! Come on Spring!!!

On Cloud Nine Today

Matt called me this morning. It has been my first phone call since he's been there. I was so happy to hear his voice. It has made my day even brighter!!! Everything is going good & he is doing great!!! Just wanted to share my sweet surprise this morning. We may not know when I'll hear from him again, but I will definitely take what I can get!!! I love my husband:)

When is it ok????

When is it ok to start missing my hubby?!?!? Grant it, I've missed him since the day he left, but being that I've only been in this deployment (him being overseas) for a little over a week now I feel as if some may think it's too early to blog about how much I miss my hubby! Some of you that know me, know that sometimes I keep my emotions & feelings bottled up inside, but this life of being an Army wife all alone is making me want to express myself. I feel right now that blogging is my therapy. Living the military life has it's hardships. I've only been married to my soldier for a year now, & he's been apart of the Army Reserves for 2 years, but with that you do get your share of difficulties & time being apart. Sometimes, I feel guilty for the way I feel about this deployment (never does it mean I don't support my hubby) & how it makes me frustrated. I know this part may pass soon, but it's the initial process of getting used to your hubby being gone & not being able to communicate with him as much as if he were home with me. I hate the days where I don't hear from him at all & have no clue what he is doing or where he is at. I'm not trying to make this post about complaining & poor pitiful me. I'm trying to express myself & the way I feel in order to cope with this journey in my life right now. One other military wife once told me that the first month or so of a deployment seems like a death. In some ways I find that true. Your not able to pick up the phone to call or text him anytime you want, never knowing when you'll hear from him again, seeing his clothes hanging in the closet, but never touched, his side of the bed is always empty, not being at home when I get off of work, his smell being faded from where it once was, not being able to share funny things when they happen & laughing together, all of the holidays I will be spending alone, the longing in your heart to see or touch him, but you can't.

I'm sure as time goes on things will get better & I am desparately hoping for that! Now, don't think I spend all of my days an emotional basket case crying my eyes out & not being able to go about my everday life. Because, I've been able to do that just fine.
And don't think that I'm not going to make it because I am. It's just one of those days that deployment emotions are taking over.

It is hard being here without him, but despite all of the negative emotions & dislikes of a deployment...I will ALWAYS be proud of him, stand by him, & support him 100% to the very end. That is my honor & duty as an Army wife. I just miss him!!!!

I love my soldier!!!

Update

This should have been posted before now, but I'm just getting to it. Update on hubby - he & his unit have reached Afghanistan but supposedly not the actual location they will be at. He says it's been nice weather over there & delicious food. He also said there are sooo many people over there. All kinds. From Canadians, British, & French. He seems to be doing good. He has only been able to let me know this by email (on Tues. night) & that is the last I have heard. But, I guess no news is good news & that I will have to keep in my mind for the remainder of this deployment. Hopefully I will hear from him again within the next couple of days!

You Know Your Soldier Is Deployed When....

1 . You sleep with your cell phone on your pillow.

2. You use an entire bottle of his cologne so you can smell him around you.

3. You get nervous every time the phone rings or you hear a knock at the door.

4. The shoes he left in the middle of the floor are now oddly comforting.

5. The postal clerk knows you by name.

6. You buy beef jerky every time you go to the grocery store.

7.You check your email every 5 minutes including in the middle of the night.

8. You have enough priority boxes, packing tape and customs forms for his entire unit.

9.You have a ton of friends with deployed soldiers who you've never actually met because they're all online.

10.You don't just tie a yellow ribbon around a tree outside, you tie one around your heart.


**Got this from my military spouse website that I joined & thought it was cute. Decided to share!!**

My prayer for this year...

Yay for February!!!!

Today is Feb. 1st!!! Yay! The countdown has begun but still....
as always!!!